Long ago, the universe held nothing but cold, obscure darkness.

Then, light fractured shadow,

giving birth to many worlds, each one as magnificent as the next.

A colony, comprised of seventy-eight planets was formed, aligned in a triangle

bound together by a beam of light known as The Keywork…

In an attempt to pay tribute to the epic-rock space-opera band Coheed and Cambria, a music-themed workout was created to accompany the aptly named ‘F3’ Amazon Prime Music playlist. Basic prescribed station work was performed continuously, rotating stations only after a song on the shuffled playlist finished. Extracurricular work was dictated by if a Coheed song played next:

STATION 1

-Curls, both arms (15 reps)

-Dips (15 reps)

-Mr. T curls (15 reps)

-Tricep extension (15 reps)

STATION 2

-Calf raises (30 reps)

-Thrusters (20 reps)

-Weighted lunge steps (15 reps, each leg)

-Air squats (20 reps)

STATION 3

-Flutter kicks (30 reps, each leg)

-Big boy sit-ups (25 reps)

-Peter Parkers (20 reps, each leg)

-V-ups (20 reps

STATION 4

-Pull ups (20 reps)

-Bent over rows (20 reps)

-Overhead press (20 reps)

-Straight-arm side extensions (20 reps)

STATION 5

-Diamond Merkins (20 reps)

-Dumbbell ‘bench’ press (15 reps)

-Chest fly (15 reps)

*If a Coheed and Cambria song plays: 10 burpees OYO, then proceed to next station (multiple songs were duplicated in the playlist to increase the odds of extracurricular work)

**If the Coheed song is ‘The Suffering’: 50 mountain climbers OYO, then proceed to next station

***If the Coheed song is ‘A Favor House Atlantic’: bear crawl to wood line and lunge-step back, then proceed to next station

****If the Coheed song is ‘Welcome Home’: Indian Run to bottom of Fury Road and back

COT:

-Count-o-rama / Name-o-rama: forgot to do these…

-No prayer requests mentioned

-Announcements- Fusion today, Shipyard Saturday

Afterthoughts:

-Not the most successful workout schemes. The work flowed much better in Inspector’s noggin. The songs were too short to successfully complete a station, and most of the time was spent trying to figure out what the hell work we were supposed to be doing in the first place. Way too convoluted and over-thought out. Q’in ain’t easy.

-‘Welcome Home’ hit once, but we abandoned the Indian Run about a quarter of the way in because it just felt silly with three PAX. A fast mosey sufficed.

-Not enough warm up / cardio was included on the front end. Actually, there was none, and everyone’s phalanges paid dearly. I was afraid I was going to break a finger on a dumbbell because they were so numb.

-Luckily there were only 3 of us (even after outsourcing social media marketing to Alpo), so the not-so-epic workout wasn’t tested on any more PAX guinea pigs. Glad both guys showed up to humor me, even though Alpo was late and Southern Belle left early.

-Even though Coheed’s style didn’t translate smoothly into an F3 workout, I highly encourage you to check out their music and graphic novels. No need to thank me.

Until later times, man your battle stations: we’ll have you home pretty soon.

Respectfully,

Inspector

#stillnotontwitter